bride praising Jesus on her wedding day as she wears mid length bridal veil in white

How to Deal with Identity + Perfectionism in a World that Says You (and your Wedding) are Not Enough

I struggle to post about myself because it’s soooo much easier to post content of my brides or pretty wedding veils. But everyone tells me that you need to post about yourself for your business to work because people like to buy from people, not from robots. This is why you will see an “obligatory” pic of me on here every few posts. 😂

Okay, so here goes. Wish me luck…

bridal accessories designer of custom bridal accessories

Uncovering the Lies that are Stressing you Out

Recently I have been going through a mini “therapy” session with the worship leader of my church. We have been going through a book called “The Steps to Freedom in Christ” by Neil Anderson. 

It has been so helpful to uncover some of the lies I have unconsciously believed about myself throughout the process. Lies like “you are not enough” and “your value is based on performance”. It’s crazy how easily these sneak into our thoughts. Anyone else out there fall prey to this? 😂

How does Perfectionism Relate to you and your Wedding Planning Experience? 

Well keep reading...

Some of the concepts in this book are so powerful. Here is one prayer that was particularly meaningful to me. It deals with people-pleasing and perfectionism.  I am including a shortened version below.

"I renounce the lie that

  • my sense of worth is dependent upon my ability to perform.

I announce the truth that 

  • the truth that my identity and sense of worth are found in who I am as Your child. 

I renounce

  • seeking the approval and acceptance of other people for my affirmation. (***this one is a biggie for me***)

I choose to believe the truth

  • that I am already approved and accepted in Christ, because of His death and resurrection for me. 
  • I have been saved, not by deeds done in righteousness, but according to Your mercy.
  • I am no longer under the curse of the law, because Christ became a curse for me. 

I receive the free gift of life in Christ and choose to abide in Him…”

(page 19, Step to Freedom in Christ)


Wow. It is a gift that is almost too hard to fully embrace. So today - whether you are a bride who is detailing with comparison and stress as you plan your wedding, you are my family member or friend, or just some random person who reads this I want to let you know that your value is based on the sacrifice Jesus made.  

praying over bride in blue wedding dress before she walks down the aisle

christian wedding with bride wearing blue wedding dress and long two layer lace cathedral bridal veil with updo

As you Plan your Wedding, there is an Overload of Comparison

This makes you stressed! In the words of one bride and blogger, if she could go back in time and plan her wedding again she would "renounce the spirit of comparison that time and again stole [her] joy during this season of preparation" (Adelae Zambon). 

beautiful curly haired bride wearing long off white bridal tulle wing set as mother helps

windy beach wedding with bride in long tulle bridal sleeve cape as a veil alternative

Is Something Stealing your Joy During the Planning Season? 

Some of my brides tell me that they feel a lot of pressure to have a wedding that would meet the expectations of guests. Sometimes your family members may be helping financially or with time and energy, and maybe you are even having friends travel to your wedding from far distances. You want to make sure that everyone has a great time, but who knows how to even accomplish this?

If you remember nothing else, then remember this.  

Your identity (and mine) are totally secure if you accept Jesus as your savior.

Try to daily remind yourself that you can drop the performance and just enjoy this exciting chapter. You don't have to please anyone because you are enough! 

If you are still struggling with comparison, be inspired by these encouraging and practical tips from the Bible.
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